Wednesday, March 02, 2005
~i gotta let it all out!!~
had a terrible encounter today during lunch.. i gotta let it out...if not, i'll go crazy!! found a table at canteen A.. a very dirty one... waiting for the cleaner to come and clean it.. meanwhile waiting for SH... then cleaner uncle came over with his trolley bin.. when he was abt to clean the table.. i pulled my chair out while standing up, with the intention of making way for him to clean the table.. unknowingly i din push my chair back while standing to one side.. he stared hard at me, looks super pissed.. so i thot maybe i shld ask him to clean the table in a polite way with a please.. after i "invite" him to clean the table, he juz looked away.. pushed the chair with a force to show that he's angry.. ok fine.. wait for him to clean then i take my wallet from my bag which is on the chair... after he's done with the cleaning, he shouted at me: HOW DO U EXPECT ME TO CLEAN WHEN U PULLED OUT THE CHAIR LIKE THIS??.. then he went on to show me what i did... i was totally shocked, dunno how to react, shouted back at him: UNCLE, HOW I NOE I WAS OBSTRUCTING U?.. wanted to explain that i din do it on purpose.. but apparently everything drowned in his voice.. yesh he din hear me explain at all and con'd shouting out loudly while moving on to other tables...
Wah... i was super angry and embarrassed bec he's so unreasonable, like i'm making his life difficult, like i purposely blocked his way... please lor... u can't blame a person who din do sth on purpose...he certainly made me feel like a sinner even though i din do anything wrong.. think he needs some anger management coz he looks angry all the time.. maybe me too... how to be happy emotionally when u r being shouted at for some misunderstanding...arghhh... very fed up....
from emotional development pt of view for him, he's very wrong coz he din control his anger/impulse, he din analyse the situation as one that's not intentional, sees me as someone out to wreck his life.. that's why he's always an angry old man.. emotionally hijacking me, noes that he can get back by embarrassing me because pple wan "face", din listen to explanations which juz leads to a deadend in communication... he can certainly help himself, me and everyone ard him by doing otherwise...
from the emotional development pt of view for ME, i fail to prevent myself from being hijacked emotionally, lack of impulse control by shouting back at him, i shld juz smile at him, say sorry, let him scold and still smile... have patience and let him vent his anger first till he's satisfied, then talk to him nicely that i din do that on purpose so he'll listen to me and we can clear the misunderstanding but cfm plus chop, most prob he'll think i siao or more convinced i did that on purpose to see his reaction.. maybe i shld also consider that it's peak hrs for him at lunchtime, too busy to cope, still got pple like me, making life "difficult" for him...but then agn, i'm human, naturally i would defend myself after being maligned.. so after being so affected by the situation, all i can do now is sit down, think abt it, LAUGH it off (laughter is the best medicine), do a better job if i'm so unlucky to be in this kind of situation agn...
phew~.. feeling better now...after a nite's sleep i'll be fine..
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Evelyn winks
at |12:12 AM|
